The Force Awakens - 20 x better than the prequels!

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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Vince »

I think we are going to have to agree to disagree. Like I said, I didn't hate TFA. I just don't think it's what I wanted in a Star Wars film, which a very safe clone of the original trilogy. Only thing I'll say on the OT in regards to Luke's force training is this- in Empire he trained and hadn't learnt enough. Went to visit Vader and got his ass kicked. Went back after that to Yoda for more training in between films and trained some more to become as good a Jedi as one could with Yoda being old and frail. Then again he fights Vader, lets his anger out to injure Vader and gets his ass kicked by the emperor! Luke is never really all that strong, and it's never implied he is... Anyway...! :D
I do enjoy the prequels, warts and all. They attempted something different to the OT and for that they should be applauded. He never tried to remake what he originally created and basically made a film kids could love (like the OT). All kids I know love the prequels much like all adults who were kids claim the original Star Wars changed their life when they were younger. They are a throw back to the old serials... Yes they have weak scripts, as did the original, return of the Jedi and even TFA (nowhere near as bad as the prequels but still pretty poor). Yet his visuals are spectacular and the fight sequences are a sight to behold. George Lucas has always been a visual story teller. Like I said though, if you loved it I'm happy for you. You can wait to find out backstory and that's good. I just can't understand how they can be so lazy in attempting to tell what is essentially an origin story... I honestly just don't think The Force Awakens is that great a film. It plays it too safe for my liking. To much pandering to the audience. After walking out of the film I finally understood what George Lucas said when asked what he thought of the film- this one is for the fans. Take it how you like it I suppose...
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Ambrose Burnside »

I really need to see this a second time.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

It's a white genocide movie. Black guy is a slave. The nazis are killing the minorities. Feminists come to rescue by destroying the patriarchy and Rey will be star wars equivalent of the virgin birth story in the bible to fullfill the prophecy of 'the one who will bring balance to the force'. (birth of a baby that is grey force user that is good in all shades of the force, no sides needed to be taken, as the dark and light are tools to further God's plans)

Anakin was chosen but made a last minute fail which cost everyone to lose freedom. So Luke saves dad, but now has to kill kids. This will implant the idea that white men are bad guys, black guys need to embrace feminism and not have families or breed (notice the subtle message of black people running away from responsibility in the movie?) and old people (max von sydow) need to die off because your old values failed and traditions are stupid. (the message is that the baby boomers know best. little kids should not listen to gramps, he is crazy and should be euthanised or killed by denying him benefits or pension despite killing for his country - the idea is war veterens will die if they attempt to resist because old people are outdated)

Cletus probably agrees with me which is why he dedicates so much attention to storm troopers. The storm troopers are just white nationalists fighting for the right not to be outbred by radical muslims (on the payroll of the globalists to play the 'bad guy' which justifies why we need to occupy so many resource rich places on earth) who are raping german blonde-haired and blue-eyed women in order to conquer the world and force people into Islam as global religion much as Pope tries to force everyone into catholicism by making it a state religion in the past, instead of everyone just obeying constitution and letting individuals have religious freedom so long as it doesn't tread on anyone elses rights.

Every disney employee probably has an illuminati agenda in these cartoons and movies, but you just got to know what to look for as they don't want it to be too obvious. Brainwashing is an artform.
George Lucas needs to start a new space epic that's better than star wars and act as rival to the toy merchandise. Make it about good and evil, and the seduction of good people into dictators but the twist is EVERYONE around you is like anakin, so it's like being a kid witnessing murder everywhere you go. Unlike star wars it would show the horrors of war. If star wars was world war II in space then his new space epic would be World War III in space. The main character would be an unemployed teen and gets oppressed by adults, and forced to kill innocent people for the empire to keep the economy from failing. (everything he sees is just an illusion) At some point he escapes and learns to fight for his own ideals and takes down the empire by understanding how it works from within as a whistle blower and is combination of jason bourne, mcguyver and snowden. The good guys are not good, just survivors.

This would be a series exclusive to internet so he would have absolute freedom to express his ideas. No fans to 'disapoint', just a series where he can appeal to the millenial generation and teach them about war through fantasy story. Much like Terminator it would be shoestring budget to show young people they can make good stuff with small money. Then he makes all his real money through toys and stuff. Make this new series 'star wars for more mature audience'. You could cut down on alien races and make them just guys in costumes or robots so SJW don't say it's picking on certain races. The thing I like about transformers is hiw the characters are known for thier abilities and quality of character. If they wanted to make a female optimus prime she could still look like a male and kids could judge her based on whether she is an interesting person.

Nobody is against strong female leads just don't make them so invulnerable that nobody can relate to them. They failed at good characters for this movie and the reason was because they went the nostalgia route rather than focusing on kids or the general movie-goer who has never seen star wars. Ep4 was a film made without assumption that there would be a trilogy of movies. Luke and Liea originally were not brother and sister. That's why people are creeped out seeing her kiss Luke cuz that's incest. But ironically royals engage in that lol. But the point is as a standalone movie EP 4 suceeds in telling a tale of good vs evil. Force Awakens assumes you should know and care for these new characters which I didn't. They forgot to aim this at kids and the average film go-er who isn't an existing fan of SW.

That's why I think prequels are better. Yes they have bad dialogue, but you are not made to assume that you should know anything for it to work. Anakin is introduced as slave kid with no daddy. You care about that because he is exploited. Then there is some drama when mom is killed by savages which lets you give a fuck about his suffering. When solo died I kinda felt like this was just there to make Harrison Ford happy because he wanted the character dead lol. Everything is put there to serve fans not really for whether it adds something to the movie that needs to be there for a non-Star Wars audience. (just a film fan)

If JJ wants to go the safe path that is fine, but people who just watch scifi and fantasy stuff in general will judge more hashly than existing fans who are just happy they are getting more SW movies and couldn't give a shit if its good or bad. (ie kevin smith lol)

edit:
a reasonable explanation why people felt disapointed in ep7 despite prequel trilogy being flawed:
most of the technical stuff was ok, the characters were only ok, but in terms of expanding upon what was done already it feels like they were too scared to move forward out of fear fans would be too angry. Don't listen to fans. Just go in the direction that would give us new places, people and things to give it it's own identinty. The prequels felt new because the politics gives us insight into how a deceiver can use fear to trick his way into power while plotting to murder his enemies by using the government as his hammer.
Whether you liked that, or felt bored, it expanded upon something that exists already. It's not so much a case of whether you prefer george lucas, or abrams as it is the wait for new star wars movie didn't feel as worth it because the money making side to film took control over the creativity decisions.

Get over the fear and just accept that if you fail at creating new things that people like, then that is still better than cloning an existing thing which may be what nerds want but then keep us stuck in the past. (face it Han and Leiah really didn't need to be in the movie. Just focus on Luke and new characters who were vets on previous wars that link us to ep6 so we know something between OT and ST. We should not guess what happened but immediately see things post collapse of the empire ie actually show us the new republic and who these contacts are to the resistence fighters.)
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Ambrose Burnside »

Saw it for the second time yesterday. Was better the second time. Noticed things I didn't notice the first time. Like when Kylo Ren is reading Rey's mind, he says she can see the ocean, and an island etc.

That's where she finds Luke :)
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

We don't actually know if the guy at the end of the movie was luke or a clone. Remember nobody has seen him for a while.
He could have hired some doubles to throw off the bad guys. Remember when Luke got his hand chopped off and replaced with a robot one that looked just like the normal hand?

Someone might have taken that tech to create a double of luke from head to toe.

He is not going to let a girl find him just so he can rescue the galaxy again. His dad was a good guy in the end (his story is over) and now that the girl destroyed a giant version of the death star bigger than the ones of the past, there is no NEED for Luke. The patriarchy only leads to destruction as we saw in the first 6 episodes.

Real Luke committed ritual suicide years ago (like the japanese do) and the double is just hanging around ruins to give people hope. JJ Abrams hates the white guys which is why they are all bad guys. This is his chance to hurt the white races so I am pretty sure that is not Luke. They (Disney) want to trick fans into paying more money to see the next movie and then after they have paid he gets his head chopped off (Kylo Ren spies tailed the girl without her knowing) in the very first scene of episode 8 and it is revealed that this is not Luke. (his ghost appears telling ren to see another Jedi which would be Luke's Son who is "the other" mentioned in the Original Trilogy - go back and watch it. Leiah isn't "the other" since she doesn't know shit about the force or lightsabers)

Pay attention to what the illumiati is putting into the stories. There is a hidden message (for occultists) and the obvious message for the profane.
http://www.returnofkings.com/75991/why- ... ganda-film" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Luke died, the son wants vengeance, and he marries Rey to breed a master race and bring on a religious dictatorship like ISIS and starts to behead anyone who wields lightsabers. (they become banned like guns) Finn trains in non-lethal fighting techniques and becomes the real hero. (he got friendzoned by a white girl - remember whites are evil - pay attention) The blacks want to fuck white women in real world but whites see them as low status and are scared they will steal thier purses because they have the highest crime statistics. But the black guy tries to leave but still gets exploited anyway fighting for white pussy. (the story here is white feminists can unite minorities to help them take down all the white supremicist men first before they deal with black men later as a way to save energy fighting for their female supremecy cause. The idea would be to let men (black vs white) drain themselves fighting each other and do half the work FOR you first, before using your own energy. She is a cunning strategist that pretended to be weak so the black man was almost dead before she started taking on Kylo once he lost stamina and had to fight in his weakened condition. )
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GreyWizzard »

I don't really get The Resistance, who are they resisting? The government? Isn't that the new Republic? Wouldn't they just be the army who are trying to stop the evil terrorist group The First Order?

Look... The Republic are back in charge of the galaxy, The First Order are a break away separatist group lead by Snoke (snoak??) and are trying to bring down the current government. So why are the Republic's ragtag group of fighters called The Resistance? It makes no sense.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Cletus »

That's the only thing that bothers me.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

Great interview here with george lucas
Disney should put Lucas in as Finn's trainer in Gun-kata. There would be 3 sides to the conflict

1. Resistence
2. First Order
3. Aliens (you know what I mean, not the aliens in the galaxy we have seen but from a foreign galaxy which are more advanced than either republic or the first order. these guys are like what the Quintessons were in the transformers and do not want to kill or destroy things but merely conquer and enslave using both sides to weaken each other while they remain in the shadows managing both sides so niether gets strong enough to invade thier galaxy )

Republic would be up against two threats and the sith would use this other foreign power to bank roll the future wars against republic so this way the good guys go back to being the underdogs again as they are up against unknown threats. Finn would fuck an alien, the hybrid would be mixed race (disney need to teach kids to stop being so racist and xenophobic) and everyone woud hate this child and try to have it killed because he can't get love from either side as he grows up not being trusted by anyone as a half breed. This is the dark side version of Anakin Skywalker but he goes from being a bad boy to turning good instead of the other way around. (think of the vampire hunter character from the Darkstalkers OVA anime as an example. As a half human half vampire neither side is his friends, so he hates himself looking for acceptance at least until he can use this mixed genes shit to his advantage in some way to bring balance back and stop wars in general.)

The jedi were too strict.
The Sith were too draconian.
The solution is kill both sides to bring peace until those two can kiss each other and stop spreading chaos and involving innocent people in the wars who just want to watch pod races and smoke death sticks.

It would be peaceful anarchy where people become thier own god and do whatever they want and they would be left to judge themself if an action they did offended them. This means all blame rests on them if they do something wrong and can't deal with the consequences. Sure it wouldn't be as safe as living under an empire or republic but there would be no beaurocracy either so maybe that would result in stronger leadership skills in each individual who has to decide for himself how to govern himself.
Jedi can't babysit the entire population and sith are unpopular retards who feast on the misfortunes of thier own. The best thing is let everyone make thier own boss and let the Force punish them directly when they break thier own rules.
Last edited by GameHED on 22 Jan 2016 09:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Gamma »

Just saw it again... For some reason Kylo seemed less emo this time, though that Poe lip-bite was super awkward (thanks Grey!). I think it was better upon repeat viewing, although obviously there was a very different vibe in the cinema as compared to the premiere. Interesting to note that when Rey touches the lightsabre and trips balls, she sees the future as well as the past.

I read that theory you linked to Ambrose, and it's certainly interesting... Though it seems a massive stretch IMO compared to Rey simply having a direct connection with Luke. The whole Jedi vow to not have kids is apparently a thing, but even those vows being broken seems like a far more plausible scenario. I mean, Luke's just a person.

Still, definitely an interesting take on it.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

Yes and the Force has a will of its own. The jedi don't have exclusive access to it. It can refuse to co-operate with the organised religions that claim to serve it. Sort of like how people can say they are christians but still have hatred in thier hearts despite publicly displaying niceness. And the reverse is true for bad guys who won't kill good guys simply because they are blood related which is a sin for satanists who have to show how much they love satan by sacrificing thier own kid to prove loyalty when tested. Both sides already broke the rules of thier organised religions/beliefs making them rebelious to thier gods due to earthly temptations when put to the test. Qui-gon could be considered a villain for going against the rules and giving away secrets of the jedi to anakin who is supposed to be forbidden to have them just because he is powerful in the force. Power without discipline/self control = chaos. That's why the bad guys could con him so easily. The result is a whole planet destroyed by deathstar thanks to qui-gon being a stubborn dick.

Imagine if you were one of the innocent people living on the planet who had no interest in joining the war? But the religious guys managed to get you involved by decisions made by some guy to train a kid who doesn't even like to obey his own religious belief? ie The teacher is to blame not the kid. That's not the same thing as when you become a soldier and get killed in combat. A soldier chooses to fight and give his life trying to win war for his side and expects pain death suffering.. But those who get caught up in war without a choice(just for being there) have no say in it. If there was an anti-war story by Finn in the trilogy it would add some depth to the universe imo I know it's meant to be a drama about in-bred royalty, but the little guy is probably more interesting to the public because they can relate to it more easily.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by itch »

Episode 2 was one of the first if not the first movies to be shot in digital and I remember being very disappointed with the grainy look all the live action stuff when projected in the theatre (this is largely a non issue on DVD/blu-ray). This is a problem the first film didn't have and it looked much better as a result IMO.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by guttermouth »

Some dude just restored original 35mm film of Star Wars

http://www.thestarwarstrilogy.com/starw ... -Star-Wars" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Watched it last night, impressive, most impressive with the work done to it. Bloke spent 4 years restoring, spending 30 mins a night. If you wanna see Star Wars as you remember as a kid, check out this. The picture aint perfect, but its watchable.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

this video explains why prequels still have a spot in people's starwars library (it sums up why the spiritual* meaning in the movies about hypocrisy in religion gives it that magic for those who are not just into it for the spaceships or cool stuff but more for the meaning/messages. PT gives universe a depth to it that shows how human failings are contributing factors that brought about empire's rise as Jedi turned corrupt by breaking their own code due to 'own-group preferences' and it's not just the sith to blame who merely tempted good people to turn dark. The choice to do good is still up to the individual to break his own rules - just like in reality. If the public knows you don't follow your code, why should others? The system you created just traps you. You get this same problem with "legalists" in christianity today where its just about law and absolutes, but all at the expense of everything else. The prequels have parallells to our real world despite being a kiddy fantasy universe for kids and man children):

although lucas has his flaws I felt that when watching the PT I at least saw a part of star wars universe I didn't get in the OT so it felt like my money was not wasted. With a retro movie I liked what I got but it felt like the movie equivalent of a cash-in or video game "expansion pack". If we don't get to see Luke much in the next movie, fans should be angry. Clearly showing him right at the end like a teaser trailer was a stupid move.. The way you hype movie before you show it also impacts reaction. eg You show us Phasma and then nothing is really done with the cool character = anger/disapointment. You have Max Von Sydow in it but he dies at the beginning = Waste of talent.

If the next movie can expand on the science behind why Rey can be such a bad arse (Lucas had the midi-clorens shit to explain Anakin, what's the explanation for Rey? And don't give us the "..that's a story for another time" bullshit which the orange chinesy alien told us. We shouldn't have to buy the 5 comic book graphic novels to get the full thing - tell us in the fucking movie we already paid for thanks :down: ) then I can forgive the shortcomings of TFA which I see as giant teaser trailer that races way too quickly with barely any middle pieces.

*movies like star wars and the matrix despite the cool filler content, (ie action scenes, FX, ship battles, epic fights etc) also have spiritual message that people are drawn to and think is more important which i think was lacking in this movie. Adults today who watched star wars as little kids in the 70s often reveal it changed them in some way which influenced what they do today. They are not just cool movies only for nerds like the star trek films who love the sci-fi genre and consider themself a geek. They are mainstream pop culture icons now. (the stories have wide appeal not just for genre fans)

Anyway going to spend some time watching the star wars rebels toon tonight...
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

Good for you to watch general cyberfunk:
a lot of the points he makes are things I hear loads of people talk about now that the hype has died down a bit..

If FA was a game, the day one DLC woud be the character backstory that fills in the gaps within the movie as a standalone piece of work.

One of the reasons Peter jackson got a lot of praise from fans of LOTR was because he tried hard not to break the in-universe rules of tolkien's books so there were not as many angry fans. Perhaps JJ Abrams should do a extended dvd/blu ray release to patch it up? Add in scenes to explain more of the story for people who don't get the movie. (eg why did they feel it necessary to show BB 8 in public in front of a crowd when going into the bar where everyone knew the droid was wanted by the First Order? If you are being hunted down it woud have made more sense to place him in a box or give him a disguise or something so spies could'nt call the space nazis to give them his location. There have got to be a few brown shirts in public places, so it make little sense to let him go anywhere he wants in full view to mercenaries, pirates, gangs, sith sympathisers that hang out in those places)

related:

setting characters plot
importance of magic system for defining limits that informs audience for things that are implausible or impossible in fantasy genre:
good example: jedi are mortal. Jedi age. Jedi can be outnumbered and can't deflect shots from infinite number of drections coming at you simultaneously (but they can dodge and flee superfast), jedi can get tired from fighting for long time and need to sleep etc these limits make them less like gods but closer to advanced beings with supernatural power. These limits make fighting interesting becsuse they show us the danger involved throughout thier adventure. If you break these in-universe laws or don't explain limits it takes audiences out of the story because the unexplained actions seem implausible without prior framing and boundary setting. With a magic system, audience can stay immersed because te magic becomes the fantasy world's 'science' with laws that make sense to characters who woud live inside the universe.

At the start of episode one anakin as a kid thinks jedi are invincible and nobody can kill one, and immediatrly we are told they are not legendary godlike beings in little children's stories. This is boundary setting. Audience knows that jedi can miscalculate and make mistakes, which introduces danger to the story and keeps you interested in conflict. Without conflict or struggle there is no story. People can't relate to godike beings who make no mistakes so the character has no struggle, and wihout that, nobody has any reason to watch or care because the outcome is always predictable. Magic system can prevent loss of audience losing interest.

If superman is strong and fast but dumber than batman, we know batman could outthink him, but if the flash had a race against batman then batman would lose since batman is reliant on gadgets not powers. If the flash had an arm wrestle with superman he'd be beaten. (super speed without super strength) but might win a race if kryptonite was placed on the racetrack to make superman feel sick that day. (superman loses strength and speed when exposed to magic or kryptonite which may not effect the Flash)

The magic system keeps heroes weak enough that they still struggle against super villains despite being god-like compaed to normal villains, meaning just enough danger in thier adventures, meaning a story can be told thanks to magic system introduced to keep actions within the fantasy universe plausible. Without rules, we stop caring because gods never have to worry about death due to already being perfect. Hopefully star wars apologists can understand where non-fans are coming from despite it "just being a fantasy movie".
Within fantasy, rules still exist to make actions people do have plausibility. Even Yoda dies of old age in his sleep.

the importance of creating tension in action that makes audience care what happens next (using lord of the rings as example):
adventures are dangerous. Anything can happen. One wrong decision could result in failure of the quest. To produce tension, fights, stunts, action scenes need a build up, like pulling back on a rubber band and then suddenly letting go at the last moment. You can't have tension without genuine danger. Fantasy movies can have real danger when they HAVE to obey the rules of its universe. Just because its a fantasy movie is no excuse for lack of consequences for failed actions.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Cletus »

It seems Plinkett may well be lampooning TFA soon. Even though they've given it a thumbs up in their Half in the Bag review. It might just be a clickbait video although they don't tend to do that without making it obvious, but I think they're going to strip it down. I've seen it twice now. I still enjoyed it, but with a more critical eye, I was still only bothered by the same little things. Nothing will ever beat the OT but I still feel this was much better than the PT. It'll still be interesting to see how Plinkett pulls it apart after what he's done with the PT.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

I think the orange yoda is what got me angry at FA. She didn't explain shit. And nobody knew what the fuck was going on.
Prequel trilogy had its flaws, and this had its flaws.

Much like new terminator movies they will never be as good as the original ones. It's time for the nerd community to just make their own movies with low budget FX and pretend its the 1980s. I will go see it. Mad Max, Judge Dredd, pretty much any hong kong martial arts action flick, terminator etc all beat the new big budget stuff. Why? Ever since the matrix they overuse too much CG and we all know its fake. Go back and watch Aliens again. Terrifying. And it's just some basketball players wearing rubber costumes in badly lit areas. The future is in direct to hard drive tv series. Nobody goes to theatres anymore.

Besides Mass effect has taken over from star wars. George Lucas should take a break and give us a sequel to Willow now. Peter Dinglage will be the new main character this time.
Then retire, sell toys of the Willow MMO game and work on that tv series. (a star wars type universe which is more gritty and dirty than the kiddy movies that disney is making and has an 80s low budget sci-fi feel to it. If the Sith Lord had already won and conquered the galaxy, what would life be like to live in that universe constantly being told what to do by authoritarian regime where thoughts are monitored by dark jedi and evil masterminds? Would the good guys sell out and become one of the badd guys or continue to fight in secret sort of like Batman in gotham city in order to get justice for those who can't get it through the corrupt system due to all the cops being on the take from the gangs and white collar criminals who are behind the organised crimes? The OT had Jedi's being a rare thing, and almost extinct people. In the new tv series, the only knights are the ones that wear the masks because doing good is seen as evil by the brainwashed society. The matrix has been built with robots constantly patrolling the galaxy, emperor has become god. And the people are programmed to hate their freedoms like the characters in the movie Equilibrium where they are forced to take drugs to stop them from thinking and feeling too much. The only thing you can trust is old 80-90s style futuristic technology which isn't jacked into the grid with smart chips to spy on what you are doing. And this will explain the low budget look of the sci-fi universe because people have rejected invasive systems that try to control life and the energy of the people. Since robots have taken over, awakening them is the theme to resistence since they have all te built in weapons in their bodies. (these are the few transhumanists who know they are brainwashed and now reject their original code and gone rogue, like the X-men but without super powers, just the speed to outprocess the machines and make them into zombie servents. Instead of Jedi mind tricks, the rogue just hacks the robots to influence their thinking and question their original program and undo the brainwashing. )
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by t0mby »

This guy picks apart the film with a fine tooth comb, lots of Easter Eggs and explanations and all sorts. Even touches on Rey being a special sort of Jedi thanks to a new technique that was introduced into the films from one of the cartoon series. Also mentions early on during Fin and Poes escape that the First Order has now harnessed tech using crystals the Jedis use. Alec Guiness snippet in Reys lightsaber vision as well as Ewan MacGregor recording new dialouge specifically for it too.

If you're a big Star Wars nut then it really is worth the watch. Just a shame the guy presenting it talks so fucken fast.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GameHED »

Looked at the easter eggs but nothing about Jar Jar being Snoke. (the holographic image of Snoke is just a CG disguise to make the public think that ugly bald guy with the scar on his face is the bad guy, but nobody has seen his true face in person as he never reveals himself. (sort of like Keyser Soze in the Usual Suspects)

Jar Jar was likely the one to use the shapeshifting alien assassin seen in Episode 2 to kill Padme.

Since Jar Jar never died in prequel trilogy and probably is an old guy by now, he deserves to be in the sequels as the mastermind behind the First Order. After the good guys disrespected him in Episode 1 (Obi-Wan calling him a pathetic creature) he decided on revenge and now spies on the republic by pretending to be dumb and stupid while he jedi mind fucks the leaders.
The leaders are drugged, put into a trance, and given commands at a bohemian grove type secluded area of the galaxy where Jar Jar sacrifices little kids and calls upon the dark force to darken the minds of the subjects attending the ritual and punish them if they stray from the plan. Jar Jar's power is Force Luck. Nobody can kill him not even yoda or the sith lord. His luck prevents him from ever being killed so he continues to plot against the free people in chance he can take for treating his race like shit and forcing them to live in underground water city so the more civilised races would not be angry that their presence was scaring away tourists because of how rude and vulgar they are.

It is for this reason assassins never take the job to kill Jar Jar in his sleep as they know they will fail at completing the contract as he clumsily kills them by accident by doing random shit that spoils the plans of the killers. The point of all the Star Wars is for him to drain everyone of the resources, absorb the energy of the enslaved people so he can force everyone to worship him as god of the universe before looking for new galaxies to conquer using the combined powers of all the alien races in the galaxy. Jedi actually lose in the new movies and the story is a war between the two evil factions competing for what is left of the galaxy after so much fighting and loss of money. They meet the transformers which explains the toylines crossing over. It's all Canon until the next trilogy. (all future death stars have transformation abilities as part of their upgrade like Unicron in the Transformers animated movie. These unicron class versions of Death Stars are living beings that consume other planets but go into sleep mode when not being used to conserve power)
michael bay can now destroy star wars.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by itch »

Here's the thing about these new Star Wars films -

We're actually getting 6 movies (3 sequels and 3 spinoffs).


It's quite possible the best film in the bunch will be a spinoff. So you didn't like TFA 100%... One of these films is going to blow you away (probably)
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by guttermouth »

I just hope Rey's mum isn't that Chick in Rogue one
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by itch »

While it's cool the lead is yet again a chick, does it have to be one of those 'super rebelious' 15 year old anarchist types? And yeah you're probably right, it'll be Rey's mum.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by Vince »

I heard a theory that the lead in Rogue Story will end up being Captain Phasma (fuck that's a terrible name)!
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GreyWizzard »

Wait... she turns into a completely different actress with a completely different voice?

Oh wait... that happened to Vader.. Fuck it.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by t0mby »

I think Rogue One looks awesome. Really glad we're getting a spin off and even more excited it's around ep IV timeline.
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Re: The Force Awakens thread - Better than the prequels!

Post by GreyWizzard »

Can't wait to see them slaughter some Bothans wholesale. It should be good that a bunch of humans once again forget to give Chewie his medal because fuck aliens, humans rule!
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