Nintendo switch thread for mental patients

[Jasper]

Another Super Mario Odyssey kingdom revealed. Introducing Seaside Kingdom (only official artwork released at this point)...

[t0mby]

Pimping official art work. Desperate much?

[Candy Arse]

An inferior version of a complete 200+ hour RPG...but you can play it on the bus?

720p 30fps vs modded 4k 60fps

[Jasper]

It's 720p and locked 30fps in HANDHELD mode, ya clown!

Anyways, on to more important things. When are you picking up a Nintendo Switch, babes?

Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle is out next week, and Super Mario Odyssey is less than 60 days away!

You can pick up a Nintendo Switch & Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle bundle next week at Big W for just $499!

[Candy Arse]

It's 720p and locked 30fps in HANDHELD mode, ya clown!

Anyways, on to more important things. When are you picking up a Nintendo Switch, babes?

Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle is out next week, and Super Mario Odyssey is less than 60 days away!

You can pick up a Nintendo Switch & Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle bundle next week at Big W for just $499!

Great so how does the docked version stack up compared to the modded 4k 60fps PC version? Worth the $600 price tag?

[Jasper]

Brand new trailer for Metroid: Samus Returns...

[Candy Arse]

The Switch is suffering from a severe lack of games while Nitnedno releases 3DS games. Awesome!

[Jasper]

The only 3DS games Nintendo have left to release are Metroid: Samus Returns, Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga, and Pokemon Ultra Sun/Moon.

As for Nintendo Switch suffering a "severe" lack of games? WTF? There's plenty of wonderful games to play on the Nintendo Switch!

And between now and Christmas...there are four major Nintendo Switch exclusive games scheduled for release (Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle, Fire Emblem Warriors, Super Mario Odyssey, Xenoblade Chronicles 2).

As for next year? There's a ton of fantastic Nintendo Switch exclusive games coming including Pokemon, Kirby, Metroid, Yoshi, Pikmin, Fire Emblem, Shin Megami Tensei..etc..etc.

Not to mention there are plenty of development studios - both internal (e.g. Retro Studios) and external (e.g. Platinum Games, Square-Enix etc) who have major Nintendo Switch exclusive games in development that are yet to be announced.

Look babes...you and I both know you are fighting a losing battle! Super Mario Odyssey (aka THE FIRST REAL 3D MARIO PLATFORMER IN OVER 15 YEARS) is under 60 days away from release! You know you're going to be driven fucking insane when it's released shortly and you're not going to be able to play the successor to one of your most favourite games (Super Mario 3D Land) in recent years....

Can't wait for Super Mario 3D World

Holy shit look at those Mario 3D World review scores. I knew this game looked awesome.

Working my way towards 100% in Mario 3D World, this game literally is flawless.

I consider Mario 3D World to be a perfect game.

[Candy Arse]

Driven insane by my 4K monitor with beast PC attached or my 4K HDR TV with a PS4 Pro attached?

Let me know when I can get a Switch for $200

[Jasper]

$200?

Sorry babes, but you're going to be waiting a very long time. The Nintendo Switch is the fastest selling Nintendo hardware in history, and is now a global phenomenon with units flying off the shelves!

Nintendo Switch Outsells PS4, Xbox One In US July Sales

The NPD Group today put out its report for July 2017, showing that the Nintendo Switch was the best-selling console of the month in the US. Its success was fuelled in part by new units coming into retail channels and the launch of Splatoon 2, which was July's best-selling game

Nintendo Switch Sales Outpacing PS4 2-TO-1 In Japan

The Switch has been available in Japan for 24 weeks now, and has managed to move 1,436,031 units. The total would be even higher, but Switch stock has been an issue since launch. With that said, the Switch is still managing to outsell PS4 by a 2 to 1 margin. When you look at the first 24 weeks of the PS4, the system sold just 653,377 units.

[Jasper]

Those poor Japs! The fuckers are STILL having to line up just to enter a lottery for the chance to purchase a Nintendo Switch!!!

3000 People Lined Up In Tokyo For 105 Nintendo Switch Consoles

Aug 18, 2017, 5:00am



Earlier this month in Tokyo's Ikebukuro, around 3,000 people lined up at a retailer for a chance to buy one of 105 Switch consoles.

As Game Memo and Science Plus report, the line was recently featured on Japanese morning show Tokudane. As with other Switch sales in Japan, people lined up to get a raffle number. Winners got the chance to buy one of the consoles. The others got nothing.

This isn't the first time the Switch has drawn a line of 3,000 people or more in Japan. The weekend before did just that. However, those retailers reported more consoles with numbers like 300 or 500 consoles given.

Tokudane also sent one of its reporters to 48 different stores in Tokyo to try to walk right in and buy a Switch. The console wasn't available at any of them.

For now, expect the Nintendo Switch shortages to continue in Japan.

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3000- ... -consoles/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[t0mby]

Look at the date in the corner, that was taken 9th June!

[Candy Arse]

$200?

Sorry babes, but you're going to be waiting a very long time. The Nintendo Switch is the fastest selling Nintendo hardware in history, and is now a global phenomenon with units flying off the shelves!

Nintendo Switch Outsells PS4, Xbox One In US July Sales

The NPD Group today put out its report for July 2017, showing that the Nintendo Switch was the best-selling console of the month in the US. Its success was fuelled in part by new units coming into retail channels and the launch of Splatoon 2, which was July's best-selling game

Nintendo Switch Sales Outpacing PS4 2-TO-1 In Japan

The Switch has been available in Japan for 24 weeks now, and has managed to move 1,436,031 units. The total would be even higher, but Switch stock has been an issue since launch. With that said, the Switch is still managing to outsell PS4 by a 2 to 1 margin. When you look at the first 24 weeks of the PS4, the system sold just 653,377 units.

That's a cool story bro, except there are no games to play on it. Happy to wait for the fire sales

[Jasper]

Look at the date in the corner, that was taken 9th June!

Holy shit, you're a fucking moron! That's not the date...it's the fucking time of day!

The above imagine is a screenshot from a morning Japanese television show. There was a segment about thousands upon thousands of japs lining up every week to enter a lottery for the chance to buy a Nintendo Switch.

The reporter even interviewed 3 generations of a family who have been lining up to buy a Nintendo Switch for 12 FUCKING WEEKS STRAIGHT!!!

3 GENERATIONS OF A FAMILY HAVE LINED UP FOR SWITCH LOTTERIES 12 WEEKS STRAIGHT WITH NO LUCK, BUT ARE STILL HAVING FUN



This is a little heartbreaking, but more heartwarming! A family was interviewed on Japanese television about their hunt to get a Switch. They've been lining up for Switch lotteries for 12 weeks now, and have struck out each time. The thing is, the family doesn't mind too much! The children, grandparents, and parents all get to spend time together while waiting in line, and it's become a bit of a tradition! The gang even goes out for dinner after their weekly attempt. We wish them good luck in their future efforts, and hope they find a way to continue the family gathering even when a Switch has been obtained!

https://gonintendo.com/stories/287789-3 ... eries-12-w" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[t0mby]

Look at the date in the corner, that was taken 9th June!

Holy shit, you're a fucking moron! That's not the date...it's the fucking time of day!

If it's the time then why doesn't it say AM or PM? Next you'll be telling me it's in army time. What a knob jockey!

$200?

Sorry babes, but you're going to be waiting a very long time. The Nintendo Switch is the fastest selling Nintendo hardware in history, and is now a global phenomenon with units flying off the shelves!

Nintendo Switch Outsells PS4, Xbox One In US July Sales

The NPD Group today put out its report for July 2017, showing that the Nintendo Switch was the best-selling console of the month in the US. Its success was fuelled in part by new units coming into retail channels and the launch of Splatoon 2, which was July's best-selling game

Nintendo Switch Sales Outpacing PS4 2-TO-1 In Japan

The Switch has been available in Japan for 24 weeks now, and has managed to move 1,436,031 units. The total would be even higher, but Switch stock has been an issue since launch. With that said, the Switch is still managing to outsell PS4 by a 2 to 1 margin. When you look at the first 24 weeks of the PS4, the system sold just 653,377 units.

That's because 60 million people have a PS4. 60 million don't have a Switch. It's not rocket surgery.

[Jasper]

If it's the time then why doesn't it say AM or PM? Next you'll be telling me it's in army time. What a knob jockey!

You dopey retarded cunt!

Why the fuck would they specify the time as AM or PM for a fucking morning television show?

As Game Memo and Science Plus report, the line was recently featured on Japanese morning show Tokudane

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3000- ... -consoles/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Cletus]

good find tomby. rocco tells lies.

[t0mby]

If it's the time then why doesn't it say AM or PM? Next you'll be telling me it's in army time. What a knob jockey!

You dopey retarded cunt!

Why the fuck would they specify the time as AM or PM for a fucking morning television show?

As Game Memo and Science Plus report, the line was recently featured on Japanese morning show Tokudane

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3000- ... -consoles/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Really?

Apologies for using an old archived photo from June in our recent Switch supply story.

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3010-apolgies-for-archived-photo/

[Candy Arse]

Oh shit

[Jasper]

Really?

Apologies for using an old archived photo from June in our recent Switch supply story.

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3010-apolgies-for-archived-photo/

You fucking scumbag piece of shit!!!

WARNING TO OTHER MEMBERS!!! DON'T CLICK TOMBY'S LINK!!!

The cunt created a fake kotaku quote, and then created a fake url to make it appear it's a kotaku link, when really he's created a link to hardcore gay porn!!!

[Madmya]

Oh tomby drops the megatonne!

Jasper

[Jasper]

Yeah, a "megatonne" of three men sucking cock in his gay porn link.

I somewhat don't blame him I guess. He knew there would be gullible tools like you and Candy Arse that would believe this fake kotaku quote without actually clicking on the link.

[t0mby]

Really?

Apologies for using an old archived photo from June in our recent Switch supply story.

https://www.kotaku.com.au/2017/08/3010-apolgies-for-archived-photo/

You fucking scumbag piece of shit!!!

WARNING TO OTHER MEMBERS!!! DON'T CLICK TOMBY'S LINK!!!

The cunt created a fake kotaku quote, and then created a fake url to make it appear it's a kotaku link, when really he's created a link to hardcore gay porn!!!

Fucken

Hook

Link

Sinker.

Lol@you believing I thought the time was the date.

Lol even more at the pic of you at a Lemon Party.

Just Lol@you in general.

[Jasper]

Oh, now you're alleging that you were just pretending it was the date and not the time of day...

Look at the date in the corner, that was taken 9th June!

If it's the time then why doesn't it say AM or PM? Next you'll be telling me it's in army time.

You are so full of shit and your damage control is beyond pathetic! Go fuck yourself you nasty little cumrag!

[flipswitch]

Those Kotaku journos are good sports though.